Articles tagged with: heart

You Can’t Always Get What You Want, But. . .

Maxima Kahn October 3rd, 2019

Following your dreams is something you are called to do. Each of us is called to follow our heart’s dreams.

Yet following your dreams is often approached in a totally wrong-headed way. A way that produces a great deal of suffering.

Your dreams are here to lead you on your heart path. Each of us must walk that path if we wish to live our fullest, richest, most fulfilled lives.

We are encoded with these dreams to such a degree that we cannot be truly joyful, if we refuse to follow them. That would be like an acorn trying to be something other than an oak.

Yet, following your dreams is not about getting everything you want.

Despite what so many “manifestation” teachers try to tell you. Trying to get everything you want is just grasping. It leads to immense suffering, as the Buddha taught.

Following your dreams is not about trying to be the “perfect” you or live a “perfect” life. It’s not about trying to fill up a deep sense of inadequacy or lack that can never be filled. Because those are lies.

You are already whole. You are enough and you have enough.

Yet there are things your soul longs to be and do, to express and experience. And these lead you on your heart path to make your contribution to our world.

Give Up the Dream of Control

Following your dreams is not about “manifesting” your desires in the sense of controlling your world.

The acorn gets no assurances of the future of the oak tree, how big it gets to grow, whether a storm will split it in two, whether anyone will ever see it.

Walking the path of your dreams does not mean you will get the girl or boy, the big house or fancy car, or even the book deal or art show—although you may get all those things and more.

This is the shocking truth many new age teachings don’t admit:

There is no guarantee of actually realizing the dream as you first imagined it.

There is no promise of success, abundance or safety.

But the surprise we discover on the path of dreams is: That’s not what it’s all about. There is something better.

Your Dreams Lead to Your Greatness

Your path of dreams is your heart path. It is about following your soul’s callings, giving what you uniquely have to give, playing your part in the whole.

Following your dreams is about growing into the fullness of who you are and can be.

Your path of dreams will ask you to shed the false beliefs and wounded self, to face your fears and shuck your laziness, all your clever subterfuge.

Your path of dreams is here to lead you to your greatest self.

It is here to challenge you and push you to grow, to heal and to shine. You cannot hide out on this path or play it safe or keep everything easy and comfortable.

Much Will Be Required of You

Your true heart’s dreams will ask everything of you.

Our true dreams require tremendous courage, devotion, care and persistence. They require inner strength, love, creativity and willingness to partner with others of like mind, to find your place.

They require your willingness to partner also with a field of Life greater than your small self, to recognize the limitations of the small self, the false self, and to live from something far deeper and more magnificent.

Many new-age teachings promise that you can get everything you want. They encourage you to feed your fear-based ego desires for money, possessions, prestige and, most of all, control.

But that is not the path to freedom and joy.

The path to freedom and joy comes from listening to, and following, your heart’s deepest desires, those yearnings that may terrify you even to admit.

And following them not out of the promise of arrival, so much as out of a willingness to go on the adventure.

You follow your dreams out of a love for the journey, the process and all the rich gifts it brings, gifts you cannot predict at the outset. There is no arrival point. That is one of the things you discover on the path of dreams, one of the many things that will set you free when you follow your heart path.

You follow because you have to, because that is who you are at heart.

You Get What You Need

I’m not saying that you will not realize those dreams that are in your heart.

With a combination of clear vision, commitment, devotion and attentive care, along with a healthy dose of surrender and partnership with the All, you can co-create extraordinary things in your life. Things that will bring great blessings to you and our world.

When you get clear on your heart’s true desires, you are in partnership with a force of Life larger than you, a force that is supporting you in unfolding in your gifts. When you clear the path to those desires by doing your inner work and taking steps to bring them to fruition, you greatly increase your chances of actualizing your dreams.

Using the processes that I teach, I have been able to realize remarkable dreams and create a life of passion, purpose and deep play that has been astonishing in many ways.

It has also been full of challenges and hard growth. Many times it has brought me to my knees, and still does.

But the path of dreams is not about trying to control life or handing the Universe a shopping list of your small self’s desires and expecting them all to be fulfilled. It is not about safety and security from the perspective of the limited self.

Following your path of dreams is about a deep sense of fulfillment, about connecting with the joy and freedom that are your true nature, and giving the gifts that only you can give.

If you would like to learn the time-tested tools and practices I teach to walk your own heart path, and get expert help on that path, check out my Creative Life Coaching & Creativity Mentoring, and sign up for a free Discovery Session with me.

Why It’s Important to Follow Your Dreams

Maxima Kahn May 9th, 2018

What Are dreams? Why Do They Matter?

Each of us, like a flower or tree, is encoded with who we are meant to be, what we are here to give, our unique beauty and gifts.

Each of us is encoded with dreams, desires, longings and visions that are here to lead us to the life that is meant for us, the life that will bring the most fulfillment, joy, meaning and connection, aliveness.

That path is not arbitrary and neither are the dreams you carry.

Dreams, as I speak of them here, are the visions and yearnings of our heart and soul that call us to our largest life, the lessons and growth we need on our path, the giving of our gifts, the realization of our greatness.

When you follow your dreams, it not only transforms your life, it transforms our world.

However, that is not what we have been told much of the time. We have been told to be practical and reasonable, to follow the status quo, to want what society tells us to want, to settle for good enough, to listen to our minds not our hearts.

Or perhaps we have been told, “You can be or have anything you set your mind to,” rather than being guided to discover the life that is already in our souls.

This leaves us feeling confused and unhappy, even if on the outside it looks like we have a good life.

The Cost of Not Following Your Dreams

So, it is vitally important to listen to your heart’s and soul’s dreams. They are your guidestar, your roadmap to a brilliant, beautiful life. When you ignore them, you feel dispirited, depressed, out of sorts and unfulfilled.

“If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you.” —from The Gnostic Gospels, Elaine Pagels

Your unique gifts, the callings of your soul, when not brought forth will gnaw at you and harm you.

“How many of us have become drunks and drug addicts, developed tumors and neuroses, succumbed to painkillers, gossip, and compulsive cell-phone use, simply because we don’t do that thing that our hearts, our inner genius, is calling us to?” —Steven Pressfield, The War of Art

It doesn’t just cost your happiness, health and well-being to ignore your dreams, it is extremely costly for our world.

We need you to be the person you came here to be, to shine in the fullness of your brilliance, to believe in the beauty of your dreams. Our world is in a dire condition because of lack of connection to the heart and because people are not finding and using their gifts.

photo by Andre Hunter

The Power of Following Your Dreams

When Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “I have a dream,” he spelled out that dream in beautiful, compelling terms. It was a bold dream, a vision way beyond the world he found himself in at the time. Yet he committed his life to help bring that dream about. Because of his daring to dream, the civil rights movement made significant, vital strides toward a more just society. And many people have been inspired to continue his vision.

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” —Howard Thurman, author, philosopher, theologian, educator and civil rights leader

It is not for yourself alone that you dare to dream and follow your dreams, it is for the huge impact that has on others, on the world around you, even on those you never see or meet. One person following their dreams is tremendously inspiring and enlivening to others, and activates the dreams in them.

“The presence of a vital person vitalizes.” —Joseph Campbell

You Need Help to Follow Your Dreams

Dreaming takes courage. When you choose to follow your dreams, you comeup against what holds you back in many areas of your life. You will encounter your false beliefs, bad habits and illusory limitations.

And so our dreams lead us on our path of growth. They lead us to transform what has been keeping us small and dissatisfied.

That is why we need support when we start to dream big. By big I simply mean outside of what we currently believe is possible for us—whether that is finding true love or sailing around the world, healing your body or starting a charitable foundation, writing a book or becoming a rock star. We are designed to need the support of others to manifest our dreams. We are interdependent beings that thrive in connection.

two friends walking together on railroad tracks

photo by Jonathan Pendelton on Unsplash

The larger the dream, the more support we need. A big dream needs a dream team of mentors, friends, helpers and allies to support us on our heart path. You cannot do this alone.

So, dreams in the sense I talk about them are not our night-time dreams but the dreams of our hearts and souls.

The dreams I am talking about are essential to who we are, essential to our happiness and well-being, essential to our world.

If you wish to live a fulfilled and joyful life, you need to listen to your heart. You need to follow your dreams, even if they seem impossible or absurd from where you are standing now.

If you wish to give your gifts and help create a beautiful world for all, it is time to believe in yourself and follow your dreams. Take action toward those dreams.

Start now.

Next Steps

To read more about how to follow your dreams and your path of heart, check out:

How to Access the Power of Love to Realize Your Dreams

The Shining Bridge to Reach Your Dreams

To get support on your path of dreams, check out: Creative Life Coaching

Seeking Your Heart’s Guidance

Maxima Kahn March 13th, 2018

A simple but powerful exercise to help you hear your heart’s guidance.

Your heart is here to guide you to your best life. Not the easiest, but the best. The fullest expression of you. The richest, most beautiful, rewarding life.

Your heart has answers your mind could never devise. Astonishing in their wisdom, rightness and simplicity.

But how do you hear the voice of your heart? How do you access that guidance?

Here is a process to cultivate connection to the wisdom of heart.

1) Set the scene

Find a place and time where you will not be disturbed. Turn off your phone (really) and close your computer. Have a notebook and pen or pencil. Light a candle or sit somewhere beautiful in nature.

2) Open the flow

This step is preparation, to get your controlling mind out of the way, to open inside. You aren’t yet seeking any guidance. You are clearing the channels to receive guidance.

Grant yourself full permission to write anything at all without judging, doubting, or expecting anything of it. Write for two full pages without pausing to think or edit, starting from the words “In this moment…”.

Write whatever comes, whatever you think, feel, notice around you or in you. Just keep the pen moving the whole time, without pausing, even if you think it is nonsense.

3) Make a request

Now, write a short paragraph to your heart, asking for its guidance and promising to listen.

You may ask about a specific challenge or situation, or you might just ask, “Oh my heart, what do I need to know, be, or do now?” or something general like “How can I live a more joyful life?”

Make a promise to set aside doubt, second-guessing, or your mind trying to figure things out and control the process.

4) Write your heart’s guidance

Drawing on the feeling of freewriting that you did in step 2, simply relax and let the pen flow, writing whatever answers seem to come from your heart.

Keep your promise to yourself not to judge, doubt, second-guess, analyze or edit the answers while you write. That will stop the flow. You can use your wisdom later to discern what feels right or to interpret it.

If your heart tells you anything you feel you cannot do or do not understand, ask follow-up questions. Express your feelings and concerns. Dialogue with your heart about them.

5) Take action

If it feels true and right—even if it also feels scary, hard or silly—follow your heart’s guidance, taking action on what you were told. Keep the faith with your heart by not ignoring its precious wisdom.

What steps will you take? What changes will you make? How will you act in accordance with the guidance you received?

Keeping the Channel Open

by JR Korpa on Unsplash

If you ask for guidance, receive it and then ignore it, you close down your connection to this most valuable inner resource. And your life will feel out of balance.

If, on the other hand, you learn to discern what your own heart voice sounds like, what it feels like when it is speaking to you, you will strengthen your access to this guide within.

Learn how your own heart speaks to you—which may be in images, sensations, impressions or emotions, more than words. Learn to trust and follow the guidance. See what happens as you do.

As you refine your ability to hear your true heart guidance, as you cultivate your deep trust in it, your willingness to follow it into the challenging, scary and wondrous places it is leading you, you will begin to create a life of extraordinary richness and beauty for yourself and for our world.

We want our souls to be fed in the heart’s great pool. Sit with your pen and wait. Sit. Listen. There, it is whispering. There, formless but real. Like wind.

If you enjoyed this post, you might also enjoy: Cultivating Intuition and A Return to Heart and also What I Know.

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A Return to Heart

Maxima Kahn October 11th, 2017

Fires, floods, earthquakes, violence, intolerance, divisiveness, greed. It’s easy to see our world is in upheaval. These are intense, challenging times.

We are being called to return to heart.

As a human race, we have been living in severe imbalance for so long that the re-balancing is requiring some radical and painful shifts in our world.

We cannot continue living as we have been—ignoring and dishonoring the livingness of our world, disrespecting and doing violence to the creatures, the waters, the earth, the air, to women and children and people of color, people of all kinds.

We cannot continue to promote the values, the way of life, the beliefs that have brought us to this crisis. We cannot cling to our possessions, our security, our fear, our cynicism, our isolation.

All of Life is Alive

by Aaron Burden

All of life is calling to us. The wind is alive. The trees are alive. The rocks are alive. The clouds are alive. All of life wishes to be in deep, sacred relationship with us. In holy communion. In partnership. As it was always meant to be.

The original peoples of all cultures were given instructions in how to live in right relationship on the lands and waters where they dwelled. Rituals, ceremonies, prayers, practices, offerings, recognition of the cycles of life. These kept the peoples living in harmony and balance with the world around them. These kept the people in balance within themselves.

When they forgot these life-giving ways, either temporarily or later completely, trouble occurred. Not as a punishment, but as a reminder of the natural order of life, as a call to return.

Life has an order that is inherently good and whole and workable. When we move with it, our lives tend to flow well. We find acceptance and peace, even in challenges. We find true joy.

We Must Live From Our Hearts

Nothing is more important than that we live from our hearts now.

We need to quiet our incessant minds, our clamoring egos, our false sense of separateness from others. We need to tune into the still, small voice within.

Photo by Dingzeyu Li

We need to learn to calm the voice of fear, the addictive habit of fear, that has been built up in us by our contemporary culture and listen instead to the voice of heart, of love, of peace. We all carry this voice. All of life carries this voice. The ocean carries this voice. The flowers do. The animals do.

Sacrifice and Surrender Will Lead to Joy

This is going to ask a lot of us. We will have to sacrifice cherished comforts, ways of tuning out and disconnecting, our sense of superiority, and much that is familiar or once felt secure.

We may have to leave the 9-to-5 job and follow our passion for art. Or take a steady job in order to support our art. We may have to downsize and band together. We may have to reach out and ask for help, instead of trying to go it alone.

We will not be able to rely on how things worked for us before. We will not be able to hide out and play small. It simply won’t work. We will meet with more chaos, disruption and suffering. Until we relent.

Now, we are asked to step beyond our wounded selves, our limited desires and preferences. To step into our extraordinary gifts, cultivate our capacities, and shine in our full Beingness.

Nothing less will do.

If you have a calling in your heart that you’ve been ignoring or neglecting, a calling that comes from love, it is time to follow it. If you have a longing to reach beyond the pain that has held you captive, it is time to heal it. If you have been ignoring the livingness of the world around you, it is time to get into right relationship with it.

Life is calling. Let us join together and answer the call.

To your Beingness,

Maxima