I have been playing this month with the idea of responsibility in my creative work. To what and whom am I responsible in my art? Here, I share some thoughts, findings and inspiration for your own creative, soulful life.
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Are Artists Born or Made?
The great creativity debate: Everyone is creative. Creativity is reserved for the special few. Which is it? And what does it mean for us?
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You Can’t Always Get What You Want, But. . .
Following your dreams is something you are called to do. Each of us is called to follow our heart’s dreams.
Yet following your dreams is often approached in a totally wrong-headed way. A way that produces a great deal of suffering.
Your dreams are here to lead you on your heart path. Each of us must walk that path if we wish to live our fullest, richest, most fulfilled lives.
We are encoded with these dreams to such a degree that we cannot be truly joyful, if we refuse to follow them. That would be like an acorn trying to be something other than an oak.
Yet, following your dreams is not about getting everything you want.
Despite what so many “manifestation” teachers try to tell you. Trying to get everything you want is just grasping. It leads to immense suffering, as the Buddha taught.
Following your dreams is not about trying to be the “perfect” you or live a “perfect” life. It’s not about trying to fill up a deep sense of inadequacy or lack that can never be filled. Because those are lies.
You are already whole. You are enough and you have enough.
Yet there are things your soul longs to be and do, to express and experience. And these lead you on your heart path to make your contribution to our world.
Give Up the Dream of Control
Following your dreams is not about “manifesting” your desires in the sense of controlling your world.
The acorn gets no assurances of the future of the oak tree, how big it gets to grow, whether a storm will split it in two, whether anyone will ever see it.
Walking the path of your dreams does not mean you will get the girl or boy, the big house or fancy car, or even the book deal or art show—although you may get all those things and more.
This is the shocking truth many new age teachings don’t admit:
There is no guarantee of actually realizing the dream as you first imagined it.
There is no promise of success, abundance or safety.
But the surprise we discover on the path of dreams is: That’s not what it’s all about. There is something better.
Your Dreams Lead to Your Greatness
Your path of dreams is your heart path. It is about following your soul’s callings, giving what you uniquely have to give, playing your part in the whole.
Following your dreams is about growing into the fullness of who you are and can be.
Your path of dreams will ask you to shed the false beliefs and wounded self, to face your fears and shuck your laziness, all your clever subterfuge.
Your path of dreams is here to lead you to your greatest self.
It is here to challenge you and push you to grow, to heal and to shine. You cannot hide out on this path or play it safe or keep everything easy and comfortable.
Much Will Be Required of You
Your true heart’s dreams will ask everything of you.
Our true dreams require tremendous courage, devotion, care and persistence. They require inner strength, love, creativity and willingness to partner with others of like mind, to find your place.
They require your willingness to partner also with a field of Life greater than your small self, to recognize the limitations of the small self, the false self, and to live from something far deeper and more magnificent.
Many new-age teachings promise that you can get everything you want. They encourage you to feed your fear-based ego desires for money, possessions, prestige and, most of all, control.
But that is not the path to freedom and joy.
The path to freedom and joy comes from listening to, and following, your heart’s deepest desires, those yearnings that may terrify you even to admit.
And following them not out of the promise of arrival, so much as out of a willingness to go on the adventure.
You follow your dreams out of a love for the journey, the process and all the rich gifts it brings, gifts you cannot predict at the outset. There is no arrival point. That is one of the things you discover on the path of dreams, one of the many things that will set you free when you follow your heart path.
You follow because you have to, because that is who you are at heart.
You Get What You Need
I’m not saying that you will not realize those dreams that are in your heart.
With a combination of clear vision, commitment, devotion and attentive care, along with a healthy dose of surrender and partnership with the All, you can co-create extraordinary things in your life. Things that will bring great blessings to you and our world.
When you get clear on your heart’s true desires, you are in partnership with a force of Life larger than you, a force that is supporting you in unfolding in your gifts. When you clear the path to those desires by doing your inner work and taking steps to bring them to fruition, you greatly increase your chances of actualizing your dreams.
Using the processes that I teach, I have been able to realize remarkable dreams and create a life of passion, purpose and deep play that has been astonishing in many ways.
It has also been full of challenges and hard growth. Many times it has brought me to my knees, and still does.
But the path of dreams is not about trying to control life or handing the Universe a shopping list of your small self’s desires and expecting them all to be fulfilled. It is not about safety and security from the perspective of the limited self.
Following your path of dreams is about a deep sense of fulfillment, about connecting with the joy and freedom that are your true nature, and giving the gifts that only you can give.
If you would like to learn the time-tested tools and practices I teach to walk your own heart path, and get expert help on that path, check out my Creative Life Coaching & Creativity Mentoring, and sign up for a free Discovery Session with me.
Your Breakthrough Dream Part II
In my last post, I shared with you the powerful tool of the Breakthrough Dream as a way of co-creating the life your heart desires. If you missed that post, click here to read it first. Today, we continue with part II.
In this post we explore how to discover your Breakthrough Dream, types of dreams, naming your dream clearly and committing to your dream.
How to choose a Breakthrough Dream
Your Breakthrough Dream might be a specific piece of a larger life dream that could be accomplished in a year or so. For instance, if my dream is to be a painter, I might choose to have a gallery show this year.
Or your dream may be something else that feels like it is needed in your life or is calling to you now, such as improving your health or repairing your relationship with your children.
The most important thing is that your Breakthrough Dream will inspire you, feel right, exciting or vital to you, and most likely scare you.
Any dream that is close to our hearts scares us because it matters to us deeply and it asks us to grow. If your Breakthrough Dream does not scare you at all, you may not have the right dream.
Your Breakthrough Dream should not feel heavy or burdensome like something you should do but do not want. Nor should it feel arbitrary, like you are just coming up with something. It should call to you, feel right to you, and feel like it would be wonderful to attain. If you sit with it for a week or two, it should feel clear that this is truly something you deeply desire that is calling to you at this time.
Some questions to help you find your Breakthrough Dream
1) What one single change in some area of your life would represent a leap for you, a breakthrough to a new level of being and living? What would bring you more peace, joy, fulfillment or open up new vistas for you?
2) If you could change one thing in your life that would make the biggest positive difference right now, what would it be?
3) Is there one thing you are really longing for in your life now that, when you think about it, lights you up and probably scares you? Is there something you would love to be, do or have that you are afraid to admit?
To be most easily worked towards, the Breakthrough Dream would be a SMART goal. Your Dream may not fit that criteria and that is fine too. Trust your heart on this.
A SMART goal is:
Specific—it’s clear what the Dream is and it’s singular.
Measurable—an outside person could easily tell whether or not you realized your dream
Attainable/Actionable—it’s humanly possible for you, even if it’s a big stretch and you don’t know how. The A could also stand for Actionable—it’s possible for you to take action toward it.
Relevant—It matters to you, it’s meaningful.
Time-based—You’ve put a time marker on when you’d like to see the Dream accomplished, understanding that life may show up differently.
Some examples of Breakthrough Dreams might be:
- build a cabin
- write a draft of a book
- become vibrantly healthy
- meet my soulmate
- have a solo art show
- go on a 3-month trip to Bali
- learn to sing
- explore my creativity
- start my own business
- get out of debt
- discover a career I would love
- uncover my joy
Beingness dreams and Doingness dreams
Your dream might be a dream that involves doing, such as writing a book or starting a business or going to graduate school, or it might be more of a Beingness dream, such as deepening your connection to Spirit or discovering your true gifts.
Both kinds of dreams are wonderful. It can be harder to find action steps toward a Beingness dream and be clear about how you know if you have reached it, but these can still be excellent Breakthrough Dreams. If you choose a Beingness dream, you will simply need to define some consistent steps you can take toward it, ways to keep it alive in your daily life and cultivate it, and some measures of success or progress for yourself.
You don’t need to know the how
Many great dreams get stopped in their tracks because the dreamer said, “but I don’t know how.” If Martin Luther King, Jr. had said that, we would not have his amazing “I Have a Dream” speech, nor, more importantly, would we have all of the radical actions he took to fulfill that dream.
You do not need to know the how of your dream. You only need to know the what, what your dream is. The dream will show you the how as you declare it and begin to take steps toward it.
Please do not limit yourself to dreams you feel you know you can have—safe, small dreams that neither scare you nor light you up. Do not limit yourself to dreams you are sure are within your power. Notice that Martin Luther King, Jr.’s dream relies on many people coming together.
Dare to dream big, but dream from the heart and soul, not from your head, not from your hungry ego, not from what the culture-at-large claims success looks like.
Wording the Dream
Come up with a simple statement of the dream that is worded in the present tense, as if you are already living the dream, that includes you in the dream, and that uses emotionally evocative language.
Also, keep the dream focused on one thing. Do not try to cram several dreams into one dream. This sends confused messages to your subconscious and generally yields less potent results.
Here’s an example of one of mine: “I am holding my beautiful published book of poems in my hand. Fierce Aria has been lovingly shepherded into the world by a wonderful press.”
I chose this dream in 2018 as my Breakthrough Dream. My book was accepted by a press in May of 2019. Although I chose a new Breakthrough Dream for 2019 because I felt it was time to choose a Beingness dream, I continued to work on this dream as well. And I am still working on it, as now there is much to do to promote the book. In fact, I might choose bringing the book into the hands of readers as my Breakthrough Dream next year.
Committing to the Dream
Once you have chosen a dream, it is time to commit to it wholeheartedly. Declare your dream to yourself and the universe. Create a ritual of planting your dream seed.
Now the challenge is to keep it in your consciousness and stay in consistent action toward it throughout the year. As I have written elsewhere, it is not enough to get clear on the dream, name it clearly and commit to it, we have to also be in motion toward it. This is our offering to the Universe, which then responds in kind with support, synchronicities, guidance, necessary challenges and blessings. Read my post The Dangers of Wishful Thinking: Nothing Changes If We Don’t Take Action here.
This is where hiring a life coach can be enormously helpful. So that you have the structures, support, skills and accountability that any big dream needs to thrive.
If you are interested in learning more about how working with me as a Creative Life Coach can help you walk your unique heart path, realize your dreams and experience profound breakthroughs in your life, click here to schedule a complimentary Discovery Session with me, and we will explore together.
My Deep Why
Last week I sent you a beautiful, inspiring, 10-minute exercise to discover your “deep why,” what you are here on earth for, what you’re all about.
This process is a way to tap your deep heart-knowing of what lights you up, inspires and moves you, what matters deeply to your heart and soul.
One student asked me: Why bother asking these questions? Why bother doing these exercises?
Because this is your guidestar to creating a deeply fulfilling, soulful life. A life that matters to you and makes a difference to others. A life of joy.
Practices like this one tune you into listening to your deep heart wisdom, your heartsong, so you can steer your life by that song. To me, nothing could be more important.
If you missed that post, you can read it here and try the exercise yourself. It’s fun and easy. It takes only 10 minutes. And it just may astound you!
Last week I promised to share with you what I got when I did the practice myself. Here it is, off the cuff, unedited: My deep why, what I’m here for.
I, Maxima, Am Here To. . .
I am here to write, to be creative, to celebrate and honor life, to care, to live from heart, to give and share.
I am here to have joy and spread joy, to love, to be playful and silly, to heal, to grow, to play, to be in wonder, to touch and be touched, to dwell in grace.
I am here to be an artist, to make beauty and magic, to dance, create, sing and make music, to imagine.
I am here to praise God, Goddess, Divine, One, and embody that, dance with that.
I am here to tend to the beauty of the world, to care for growing things, to walk the path of Heart, to walk in the footsteps of the Divine, to honor the Sacred in others and in all things and call it forth, to conduct ritual, ceremony, to be a leader, a healer, a magician, a teacher, a lover, a mystic, a muse.
I am here to give thanks for the creation and work to mend the tears and injustices. I am here to gather the divine sparks.
I am here with my love, my vulnerability, my heart, my spirit and spark and light and fire. I am here to not be ashamed, to love and be loved, to stand in the light and the darkness, to love it all.
I am here to listen to the wind and the ocean, the rocks, trees, birds, streams, animals, plants, to sing their songs.
I am here to elevate, to inspire, to make music, magic, art, song, to be one with the One, to come home, to belong, to help others belong. To believe, dream and reach for the stars.
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It’s empowering to know your Deep Why, to stand in it, to proclaim it and live it.
Share some of your Deep Why in the comments below. And/or share what comes up for you as you read this. Let’s inspire one another!
Why the Heck Am I Here?
In this post, I share a fun and inspiring practice to help you discover your “life purpose” by tapping into your own deep wisdom and intuitive knowing.
That way, you can live in alignment with that which brings you deepest meaning, joy and fulfillment in your life. Sound good?
Let’s begin.
I Am Here To
- Get a pen and paper. (Many studies have shown, writing long-hand is way more beneficial and powerful than typing on a computer. Writing by hand connects you to your heart and body wisdom in a way that typing on a keyboard cannot. If you are physically able to do so, I strongly recommend you do this practice by hand.)
- Set a timer for 10 minutes.
- Start with the words “I am here to.”
- Write everything and anything that comes to your mind in response to those words. Keep returning again and again to “I am here to” to begin many of your sentences.Some ways you may interpret the question include (but are not limited to):
• What are you here on earth for? Why did you come?
• What is your life purpose, your passion?
• What are your gifts?
• What do you love?
• What matters to you? What do you stand for?
• What can you give with joy? What do you already give?
• What do you want your life to be about? - Keep your pen moving as you write in response to the words. Don’t pause to think, plan, question or edit. Don’t worry whether what you are writing is accurate, true or complete. Don’t worry if it’s nonsense. Don’t worry if it’s terrible writing or great writing or whether you’ve wandered too far afield. Just write. Let it all flow out.
Write From Your Heart
Give yourself permission to be grandiose, to dream, imagine, play on the page. To say what you think you’re not allowed to say. To speak with authority and wisdom, humor and grace and heart. Resist the urge to belittle yourself, to say “I don’t know.” What if you did know?
If you have more to say than 10 minutes, keep going. If you think you have said everything before 10 minutes is up, keep going until the timer sounds, even if you have to repeat yourself. Let yourself be surprised by what else comes when you think you’ve said it all.
If there’s something you write that you find helpful or inspiring, you might want to post it where you can read it from time to time and remember why you are here.
I’d love to hear your responses to this practice. Post in the comments here.
Next week I’ll share some of what I wrote when I did this exercise.
To your shining being,
Maxima
To read more on the topic of “life purpose” and finding your unique brilliance, start here.
Hey, if what you read here inspires, helps or moves you, consider sharing it with others using the share buttons here.
How To Discover Your Unique Brilliance – Part 3
by “icetray” c. 123rf
Today I share with you three more keys to finding your Unique Brilliance, those gifts that are your signposts to a life that is fulfilling, joyful, passionate and inspiring.
The first two keys you may remember from my post on “The Trouble with Finding Your Life Purpose.” These are vital distinctions that will help you see what your Brilliance is and not get lost looking for it. The third key may surprise and challenge you, but it illuminates your own Hero’s Journey in this life.
If you missed my earlier posts on Unique Brilliance, in which I cover the first 4 keys to finding yours, you can find them by clicking here Part 1 and here Part 2.
- Your Unique Brilliance is not a job description.
I wrote about this aspect of Unique Brilliance quite a bit in my post on “The Trouble with Finding Your Life Purpose,” so I’ll be brief here. But this is a key point about Unique Brilliance.
For instance, your unique brilliance is not being a “veterinarian” per se, but rather perhaps you are a lover of animals, good with animals, fascinated by science/biology/the inner workings of the body, gifted at healing.
Stop looking for a job or career that your Unique Brilliance adds up to and you’ll be much more likely to see it. Later, you can discover what kinds of work use this Brilliance in satisfying ways.
by miller mountain man c 123rf
Your Unique Brilliance is not singular.
You came with a number of important gifts to share, gifts that you express in a unique way that are needed and wanted at this time. If one or more of your gifts doesn’t match with a job description or isn’t valued highly by our society, it may be harder to see it, but it doesn’t make that gift any less important or essential to who you are. And it is the unique way your gifts combine that adds up to your unique brilliance.
I like to give the example of my friend Molly. Molly has many gifts I could name, but I’ll focus on three for now. She’s a gifted poet and writer.
She’s also a truth-teller. She tells the truth even when it’s uncomfortable. She speaks what others are afraid to talk about, what’s difficult or considered shameful, awkward, but also of beautiful and funny things. This is a real gift and service to humanity, and it comes through her writing, her speaking, her way of being in the world. Her truth-telling sets others free, encourages them to be brave and truthful and to be kinder to themselves and others.
She also has a gift, and proclivity, for matching people up who need each other. I don’t mean romantically. If someone needs their garden tended, she knows a gardener looking for work. If someone needs jars for canning, she knows someone who is de-cluttering and is getting rid of jars. I include this gift of hers for two reasons. It’s not part of her career, it doesn’t make her any money, yet it’s wildly helpful and important for the community. So, don’t overlook these gifts in yourself.
My father had a brilliant, incisive mind, a rapacious intellectual curiosity, a willingness to contradict and revise earlier points of view he had held, a love of philosophy and the life of the mind, but he also had great personal warmth and charm, was a devoted teacher, and a really good cook who loved to entertain guests. All of these added up together to complete the unique brilliance that he possessed.
- Your challenges, weaknesses and wounds also are a part of it. Your biggest challenge and your biggest gift are bound up together in some way.
photo by Braden Collum
This can be a tough one to accept, but I have seen over and over that our biggest wounds, challenges and weaknesses in life are intimately tied up in our biggest gifts, in what we are here to give. For example, I just watched the movie Race about the Olympic gold medal runner Jesse Owens.
As his wife points out to him at a pivotal moment in the film, Jesse Owens was born to run. He had an incredible gift as a runner. He was considered the fastest man on earth in his time, and he loved to run. Note that he still had to train hard and sacrifice to develop that gift.
But he had another important gift that was tied to his biggest challenge. He was a black man living in a time of intense racism and segregation in America and also during the time of the Olympics being held in Nazi Germany. His gift was to win gold medals in those Olympics and show the world that color and race do not determine ability, that there isn’t one race that is better than others, and that the pervasive racism he suffered couldn’t keep him down.
What have been the most painful, difficult, challenging experiences of your life? What have you struggled with? What has felt like a weakness or burden? How might these have shaped the gifts you have come to share? What capacities have you developed because of these challenges?
In my next post, I’ll share the final key to help you discover your Unique Brilliance. It is such a crucial one that I have saved it for last.
I would love to hear your comments and questions. What opened up for you in reading this post? Any ahas? If you write in, I’ll respond.
To your shining,
Maxima
If you would like help uncovering and making the most of your Unique Brilliance to create a passionate, fulfilling life centered around what you most love, check out my one-on-one Mentoring Program. It could be life-changing for you.
